this should be

the happiest time of my life, but i want to cry 24/7

My bf and I are moving into our new home in 2 weeks. I should be relieved but i'm stressed out my box. I think my mind is working overtime, thinking things that are not even there.

Ive had a really crap couple of months. I've gone from doing everything with him to doing just about nothing. We go to the cinema. Thats it. So basically we are quiet. I get frustrated all the time. Its not fair on him. I feel i'm adding loads of stress to our relationship. I contemplate that he would be better off without me. I wonder why he is even with me when all i do is moan and complain.

We used to spend all our time together, go to bed at same time, even if it was in different beds, talk during the day, text (nice happy texts) throughout day, look forward to seeing each other when work was finished, eat dinner together, workout, play games or watch films, talk, kiss, make love, cuddle, fall asleep. We'd go drives to random places and spend hours chatting. Now, we drive to the cinema, watch a film, drive home. We talk in the car, obviously, but its nothing in comparison. I just feel its taken such a HUGE step back. Maybe we had too much too soon? Maybe I am far too needy.


But I feel I need more. More of everything above. I need an affection injection.

I hope I read this blog in a few months time and think back to how silly it sounds. I hope moving in together will bring all the love and affection back. I know both our stress levels will be reduced, due to our current living conditions, so hopefully all the other barriers will fall.